Category Archives: Dying

Cat Number Five

Meet Cat Number Five a/k/a Spotty a/k/a the Damn Cat. Spotty came to live with me late in the evening on September 15; the night my mother died. He has settled in quickly and well. I thought I would need … Continue reading

Posted in Alzheimer's, Bald Eagle, Canada, Cats, Death and Grief, Dementia, Dying, Elder Care, Elderly Parents, Grief, Grieving, Love | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 60 Comments

To treat or not to treat

On Monday I got the dreaded call from assisted living (AL): mom fell again. She had a big bump on the back of her head. The AL nurse feared her hip was broken. So this time, unlike the last time, … Continue reading

Posted in Alzheimer's, Assisted Living, Dementia, Dying, Elderly Parents | Tagged , , , , , , , | 33 Comments

My Key to Freedom

I hate being a lawyer. There. I said it. Out loud. I fucking hate being a lawyer. I dread getting out of bed in the morning. I feel utter despair when I think about doing this job for Ten More … Continue reading

Posted in Blogging, Dying, Exercise & Fitness, Grief, Health, Insomnia, Meditation/Mindfulness, Overactive Bladder, walking, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

A few words about my brother

I’ve been working on my tribute to my brother at his service tomorrow, and here’s what I’ve got at this point. I still can’t recollect a specific “sweet” story. Dammit. A and P asked me to say a few words … Continue reading

Posted in Death and Grief, Death of a sibling, Dying, Eulogy, Fishing, Grief, Ontario, Travel, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

Last Chance

My mother slipped back into the bargaining stage with my brother’s intervention. I was very hard on her tonight trying to get through to her. I made her cry. But she understands now she has to fire him if he … Continue reading

Posted in Alcoholism, Dying, Grief, Health, Intervention | Tagged , , , , , , | 5 Comments

The Feeding Tube

My father had brain surgery on September 18, 2012 to remove a blood clot. In the first few days following surgery, he seemed better. We thought he was going to continue to get better and go home. He was eating, … Continue reading

Posted in Alzheimer's, Dying, Feeding Tube, Love, Marriage, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Burial At Sea

My sister was in a rush. Everything needed to be done right away. She said my mother needed closure. You can rush through the usual rituals following death. But you cannot rush grief. Still she was determined. My father was … Continue reading

Posted in Death of a sibling, Dying, Grieving, Love | Tagged , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Vigil

The sun is beginning to rise following the third night of my vigil. The days spent in my father’s Hospice room with family and friends are precious. But it is the nights I spend alone with him that I find … Continue reading

Posted in Alzheimer's, Death and Grief, Dementia, Dying, Elderly Parents, Grief, Grieving, Healing, Letting Go, Love, Marriage, Stages of Grief | Tagged , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

Inpatient Hospice

Dad is now in inpatient hospice. We moved just down the hall from his rehab room at the nursing home. Hospice has a small wing here, so the move was only minimally stressful. Yesterday, before the hospice room was ready, … Continue reading

Posted in Alzheimer's, Death and Grief, Dementia, Dying, Elderly Parents, Grief, Grieving, Letting Go, Living Life, Love, Marriage, Stages of Grief, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Coming Home

My mother is a strong, brave woman. She set aside her desire to have my father here a little longer, and decided against the feeding tube. She said he wouldn’t have wanted it.But when we met with hospice, she couldn’t … Continue reading

Posted in Alzheimer's, Death and Grief, Dementia, Dying, Elderly Parents, Grief, Grieving, Healing, Letting Go, Living Life, Love, Marriage, Stages of Grief, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | 11 Comments